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Director's Cut
turtle
tortispullo




The Old Man’s Hand – Directors Cut
 
There once was this grimy old man
Who had a cat’s head for a hand
     It yowled and fussed miserably
 
He tried to conceal that hand
With an old coffee can
     But the yowls just echoed weirdly
 
So he took his sharpest ax
And with two painful whacks
     He beheaded his hand in agony
 
Well, the old man soon died
And his widow wailed and cried
     While the head floated around happily
 
INTERMISSION
(she feels cheated
built up
let down
some further interaction
is required
for her satisfaction)

And so…
It bit another cat and that cat turned dead
            and rose from hell to become another floating head
                        its fur rotted off and its eyes glowed green
                                    it was the meanest motherfucker I had ever seen.
                                                and you knew damn well it wouldn’t stop at that
                                                            floating puss head number TWO bit another cat!
 
So plague just spread throughout the whole town
     till the sky was filled with cat heads floating around
            it wasn’t too long before Uncle Sam was on the scene
                        to drop the whole god damn town under quarantine
                                    but in absolutely no fucking way was this nightmare done
                                            those heads got out and the puss plague killed everyone!
 
THIS IS HOW THE WORLD ENDS
THIS IS HOW THE WORLD ENDS
THIS IS HOW THE WORLD ENDS
NOT WITH A BANG BUT A YOWL
(she loves it)